The Way I Am

I've been thinking about my life and the way I do things now and how I use to do them. Starting this blog was a good thing for me because sometimes I want to talk about something but I might be embarrassed to say it, but its a lot easier to write about it.

I get up everyday and I workout, practice with my stimulator throughout the day, work on my speeches and try and ride my hand cycle. Just that keeps me pretty busy I also have a lot more that I try and get done sometimes I find myself making up excuses on why not to do them.

Here's what I want to write about and its not that I'm complaining or looking for sympathy I just want to talk about it. I see some of my friends with there wives and kids or my buddies that work out at the mines and they are all just living their life in a way that I thought it should have been for me. My brother works with my dad in our family company doing all the things that I use to do and I know my dad and brother would love to have me back working with them...I just don't see it in my future anymore...as bad as I wish that it was.

An everyday issue for me is going places like to a friends house, concerts, camping, traveling, really anything and having to make sure I can get in there with my wheelchair is a pain. There are all kinds of things that I think about that make me wonder, why did this have to happen to me?

It's ok though because I like to use these feelings for fuel to keep me pushing on and trying to reach my goals. I know it's not going to be easy. I've also had an amazing opportunity to be part of a research program that is improving the lives of people living with spinal cord injuries. I know I have to keep working hard and doing the best I can, not only to benefit myself but to provide the best information to the research ultimately helping everyone with an SCI to reach their goal to walk again.